Year 2005 was rather nerve-wracking for a kid like me, who lack of courage and self-confidence.
That year, I entered a Secondary School, just like many other kids. I was exposed to a whole new load of things, which freaked me out initially. But, I got used to it after some time. It seemed like there are endless stuff to be learned. The list goes:
1. Taking the correct bus
2. Understanding the changes associated with puberty
3. Figuring out the "right" kind of friend(s) I should hang out with
4. Managing the "funds" so that I would have enough to spend
5. Finding a cool CCA (Co-Curricular Activity) in school
...
In the end, I have managed to complete the 5 "tasks" as shown above, and tons of others. However, I did not really complete the tasks smoothly, like how some of the cool kids would have done. Let me tell you bit by bit.
For point 1, I did take the correct bus to school, and then back to my home (Hurray!). I did alight at the correct bus stop that is just outside the school. But... On my way home, I alighted at the wrong bus stop because I had pressed the bell too early. I was really embarrassed as I alighted and I had to walk a distance before reaching my apartment.
For point 2, I understood that there would be the start of menstruation, pimple-outbreaks, the change in body shape, etc. However, I did not know what to do about all these. During the first menstruation, I kinda freaked out seeing the bloody stuff and all I knew was that the cramps were making me uncomfortable. As for the first pimple-outbreak, I looked into the mirror and wondered why all the evil pimples had to grow on my face and lower my self-esteem.
For point 3, I did figure out the right kind of friends to hang out with after 2 to 3 years. For the first year, it was impossible for me to differentiate right away the kind ones whom I can approach, and the evil ones whom I should keep myself away from. It took many tries before finding the right clique, the friends who are constantly there for you, the friends who motivate you to do well and help you along.
For point 4, I did manage to spend within my limits, using the pocket money given by my mum. Actually, I did not have much difficulty trying to manage the funds as my mum would ask me on a daily basis on whether I have enough to spend or not (which I am always thankful for, or else my stomach would have suffered).
For point 5, the initial stage of finding the dream CCA was tough for me. I joined a uniform group called the Girl Guides just because I was a Brownie back in Primary school. On the first day of the CCA, I realised that I didn't really like it, and we were told that we need to pay for our own uniform once again (A brownie had to pay for her uniform as well). Thus, I made a bold decision. I quit that CCA on the day itself. Then, after some time, during an assembly where we were all seated, two teachers from a CCA called "Air-Rifle Club" began to approach us and took down the name of those who are interested in the CCA. Having no CCA at that point in time, I jot down my name and decided to give it a try. It eventually became my favourite hobby and I'm always proud to say that I was once an Air-Rifle Shooter and I had joined the coolest CCA on earth!
Looking back, it wasn't so bad being a 13-year old. It was the age that we had to start learning slowly on how to grow up and have fun at the same time, unlike now that as we grow older, it seems that we have forgotten how to reward ourselves by having fun. We simply work too hard trying to achieve our goals and neglect that inner child in us. Don't let that inner child in us suffer. Think about it.
I shall end this post with a poem I wrote for a Literature assignment, when I was 13. My mum just read it and she couldn't stop laughing because of the drawings and words.
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